If he says “no,’ you’ll survive, and you’ll also have a wonderful opportunity to learn a little something, especially if you’re as close with him as you say you are.If he says no to your request for a date, ask if there’s anything you’re doing that’s sabotaging your chances at love.I am 30 years old, relatively successful in my current career track, intelligent, attractive, easy to talk to, and very friendly. None of my girl friends believe me when I inform them of this fact. I’ve asked them when we’re out with guys if I’m giving off some sort of lesbian or “don’t come near me! I’m very good friends now with someone whom I would love to date, but I’m afraid I’ve already fallen into the “friend zone” with him.

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If you have a relationship/dating question I can help answer, you can send me your letters at [email protected](be sure to read these guidelines first). New readers, welcome to Dear Wendy, a relationship advice blog.

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If you don’t find the info you need in this column, please visit the Dear Wendy archives or the forums (you can even start your own thread), or submit a question for advice. To the best of my knowledge, no guy has ever been attracted to me.

I simply don’t believe that a 30-year-old woman who is everything you say you are would have as much trouble finding a date as you have without taking some active role in her situation.

There’s either some reason you don’t ) and you’re subconsciously sabotaging your attempts, or, as I said earlier, you suffer from RDD and the defects you think you have when it comes to relationships only exist in your head.

Sure you have those once in a million times where the man actually leaves his wife for another, but for the most part, it is a script for adultery disaster.

The love affair with the married man starts with a man who married for the wrong reasons and thus never truly felt fulfilled in his commitment to the wife.

I try very hard to celebrate my singleness and most of the time I succeed, but with my (younger) sister’s wedding coming up I’m getting just a little bit less celebratory. — 30 and Dateless No, it’s not time to join a convent, but it’s definitely time to adjust your attitude.

It’s great that you think you’re relatively successful, intelligent, attractive, easy to talk to, and very friendly, but why on earth haven’t you extended some of that confidence and positive thinking toward your love life?

Did you cast a wide enough net, or were you limiting your search to handsome 33-year-old MDs with Doberman Pinschers? Maybe you aren’t presenting yourself in the best light or making it easy for men to find you (for example, not posting a picture of yourself is a sure way to limit the amount of attention you attract online).