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It’s the cry amongst the hapless Nice Guys that women only like assholes and therefore ignore the Nice Guys who would, like, totally treat them with respect man…Meanwhile, other men will tell you over and over again that you need to be the Alpha Male, that you need to be dominant and prove you’re her social superior. They’re staring at you from the covers of the gossip magazines and the front pages of TMZ with the latest arm candy.
But hey, it sounds like a simple, easily digestible solution to solving the world’s dating problems, right?
When you take a bunch of people with a shaky grasp on evolutionary psychology who try to apply the concept of Alpha onto the convoluted morass that is human sexuality and sell it as advice, you end up with the vague idea that being “alpha” means being “dominant” or “socially superior”.
Because of the way ape sociology works, the alpha male has the most access to food and the females.
The apes below him in the hierarchy, the Betas, have a greatly reduced access to sex, food and basic dignity.
And of course, the guy who’s busily banging away at the girl you like – you know, the one who seems to be the source of all of that drama she keeps coming to you with, the one who couldn’t an asshole.
Tally it all up and you could be forgiven for thinking that being an asshole is the common denominator.Some will tell you that it’s about staring down or squeezing out the other men around the woman you’re interested in. The reason why it’s become accepted that women like assholes is due to a logical fallacy known as the defective induction.Some will say that it’s about keeping her insecure in the relationship and always having to please you. You see women with assholes repeatedly and you assume that this is universally true…2 View All Next »It’s been about six months or so since I addressed that perennial bugbear of nerd dating, the Nice Guy, and after some of the comments I’ve seen, on the blog and elsewhere, it seems like as good a time as any to revisit the topic.Y’see, there are certain myths and misconceptions when it comes to dating that seem to have become axiomatic amongst men and chief among them is the classic “Women like assholes”.no matter how many women you see or know personally who’re dating perfectly decent individuals.